Unfriended on Facebook.... and you're out!

 Unfriended on Facebook.... and you're out!

Have you ever met the Mom who is still in the High School popularity mode? The one who makes you feel like she is the cheerleader and you are the unpopular geeky kid... the kid with zits that should disappear, the girl who isn't worthy enough to be invited to that party? I know I have. 

This week I realized someone had unfriended me on Facebook. I am 46 years old; I shouldn't care, and yet somehow I did. It wasn't a close friend, just another Mom. Then I saw a group of her friends, and they looked at me with anger, and I thought, "What have I done?" I knew at that moment I was out!

So how do I deal with this? I am not embarrassed to tell you I went back to my teen mode and called my Mom! You heard me right I called my Mom over being unfriended, and I am lucky that I still can. We had a long conversation about the fact that things don't change.
My Mom told me, "I am sorry if you're different, but I raised you not to fit in, to think outside the box, to be compassionate, caring and deep." I could only hope that I am all of this and that I live up to her teachings.  I am sorry if anyone thinks differently of me, but I will stand my ground on my ethics and beliefs. However, if I have hurt anyone, I will always be sorry.

I then told my kids about being "unfriended." They were shocked, thought it was strange. We had a great conversation about reflecting on why someone might act this way, healthy social and social media skills. After all Social 'drama'  is not only ever-present among our teens, but it is also part of adult life. When you share your struggles, you help your children grow up. Even though I wish I could pull out a magic wand, chant abracadabra and make all of this go away, it doesn't, and I can't! You just learn to manage it better.

—Allison Ochs Social Worker M.S.W. , Coach, Expat, Mother of three, Wife